


Username: Password

by TheAzureFox



Category: Pocket Monsters: Sword & Shield | Pokemon Sword & Shield Versions
Genre: F/M, Gen, chat fic, i attempt comedy lol
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-10-25
Updated: 2019-10-25
Packaged: 2020-12-27 22:43:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,320
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21126461
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheAzureFox/pseuds/TheAzureFox
Summary: In which the cast of Pokemon Sword and Shield regrets the world of text messages and group chats.





	1. Chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hewwo
> 
> comedy is not my strong suit but i wrote this to destress from school stuff and it's surprisingly been a ride to write for. I def have a second chapter in mind as well as a potential third but for now this is it
> 
> Setting is somewhere after the main plot has been finished yet Leon hasn't been defeated yet by the protags. Also assumes the plot doesn't continue up until after the champion battle occurs but then again we know nothing about the plot of the games anyways so let's just assume plot happened, everyone got traumatic but now they're recuperating with the power of friendship and casually forgetting the plot even happened

I’mGoingToBeTheChampion: Hey guys looks like there’s snow in the Wild Area right now. It’s pretty cool out here.

FuckYouGloriaI’mGoingToBeChampion: I think you mean it’s fucking cold.

Chill_U_2: _Language_ Bede

FuckYouGloriaI’mGoingToBeChampion: Fuck off

Chill_U_2: /:

HopUseProperSpelling: I’m in the Wild Area right now. Where you at?

I’mGoingToBeTheChampion: Watchtower Ruins. You?

HopUseProperSpelling: :’)  
  
HopUseProperSpelling: I’m at the northern lake.  
  
Chill_U_2: oof that’s far

I_Like_Hats: I’m relatively close to you, sis. Want me to come by?

I’mGoingToBeTheChampion: eww no. No one likes you go away

Chill_U_2: :OOOO But I like Victor !!!Hes cool.

_HopUseProperSpelling has now been changed to HopUseProperSpellingandPunctuation_  
  
I_Like_Hats: *points to Hop* He gets it

Chill_U_2: *eyes Marnie*

HopUseProperSpellingandPunctuation: :>

_Chill_U_2 has now been changed to IRefuseMarnie_

HopUseProperSpellingandPunctuation: :/

IRefuseMarnie: Proper spelling and punct is bad for my health lo l

HopUseProperSpellingandPunctuation: No it’s not. Proper spelling and punctuation shows engagement in a conversation and a will to be professional. It’s important to speak in a manner to your peers that shows respect and dignity.

IRefuseMarnie: Look Marnie ur cute but no >:)

HopUseProperSpellingandPunctuation: I

HopUseProperSpellingandPunctuation: Come on Hop. You’re going to drive me crazy.

IRefuseMarnie: Plz?

HopUseProperSpellingandPunctuation: …

HopUseProperSpellingandPunctuation: Fine. Plz?

_IRefuseMarnie has now been changed to OkayMarnie_

_HopUseProperSpellingandPunctuation has been changed to IloveyouHop_

_OkayMarnie has been changed to ILoveYou2_

~~~

SuperiorSister: Hop and Marnie are flirting as usual

InferiorBrother: They look like just how u flirt with Bede ;)

SuperiorSister: …

SuperiorSister: *holds up knife*

InferiorBrother: Gloria? Gloria NO

Superiorsister: come to the Wild Area Victor I DARE you

InferiorBrother: No I…I think I won’t…ha…ha…

~~~

JerkISomehowHaveACrushOn: You’re at Watchtower Ruins, right?

MeTheIdiotThatIAm: Yeah, why?

JerkISomehowHaveACrushOn: There’s a Gallade that showed up at the Pokémon Den by the eastern southern lake. Want to join me on a raid?

MeTheIdiotThatIAm: Wait ur in the Wild Area right now?

JerkISomehowHaveACrushOn: Of course I am. Where did you think I was?

MeTheIdiotThatIAm: In my house?

JerkISomehowHaveACrushOn: .

JerkISomehowHaveACrushOn: Hey Gloria

JerkISomehowHaveACrushOn: quick question

JerkISomehowHaveACrushOn: what the fuck

~~~

BeanieGal: Bede just invited me to go on a raid with him. Help. What do I saaaay

PunkGal: Tell him to bring flowers.

BeanieGal: This isn’t a date >:O

Beanie Gal: Plz Marnie I need legit advice

PunkGal: Just tell him that you’ll join him. Nothing can go wrong from that.

BeanieGal: Will do

~~~

LovelyRival: Um, sorry, autocorrect!! I meant to say at the corporation.

LovelyRival'sRival: how the fuck does "corporation" autocorrect to "my house"

LovelyRival: um

LovelyRival: UMMMM

LovelyRival'sRival: _Gloria_

LovelyRival: Look I totally don't know okay??

LovelyRival: So anyways! Regardless! I can totally join you!! If you'll still have me!

LovelyRival’sRival: ...I'll be waiting then

~~  
  
BeanieGal: I think I fucked up

BeanieGal: But he accepted so??? I think it's good

GothGal: *thumbs up* 

~~~

ACoolVegetable: Gonna raid with Gloria :>

VIsForVictory: fdhjfhj I find it hard to believe my sister would agree to raid with you.

ACoolVegetable: And why is that

VIsForVictory: because ur uncool and she only hangs out with cool people. Like me.

ACoolVegetable: oh really now *holds up knife*

VIsForVictory: :O

VIsForVictory: What is up with you two and threatening me

ACoolVegetable: idk maybe it’s bc ur weak and fun to pick on

VIsForVictory: Weak, eh? Doesn’t stop me from kicking your ass every time we battle though

ACoolVegetable: *grabs another knife*

~~~

#00One: Did raid battle with Bede. Went good

YELL: Did you kiss him?

#00One: ????  
  
#00One: ofc not. This wasn’t a date or whatever the fuck you’re thinking it was.

YELL: Aw. Disappointing.

#Don’tStealMyBrother’sNumberGloria: Laugh my ass off. Got to ask though: What happened?

#00One: I’m dying. I think I might like your new way of speaking.

#Don’tStealMyBrother’sNumberGloria: <strike>Thank</strike>

YELL: <strike>HOP</strike>

#Don’tStealMyBrother’sNumberGloria: <strike>Oh right. Thank you.</strike>

#00One: vghjkjjk

#00One: Anyways

#00One: I got a Gallade yeet. He’s pretty chill. Pretty sure he wants to murder me but other than that he’s cool.

YELL: And what about Bede?

#00One: What about him?

YELL: On a scale of 1 to 10 how romantic was he?

#00One: I

#00One: I am _seconds_ away from banning you from this group chat Marnie

YELL: You won’t do it. You love me too much after all :)

YELL: But seriously there’s got to be more to it than that. After all, he totally has the hots for you.

#00One: I’m pressing X for Doubt on that

#Don’tStealMyBrother’sNumberGloria: No I’m pretty sure he’s smitten with you laugh out loud.

YELL: Like “goes red in the face and no longer knows how to compute words” smitten.

YELL: Don’t try to deny it he makes it Very Obvious around you

#00One: GUYS

#00One: I’M PRETTY SURE BEDE DOESN’T HAVE A CRUSH ON ME  
  
~~~

BedeBaby: I have a crush on Gloria

BedeBaby: I mean it's pretty weird because I've never noticed it before but

BedeBaby: She's pretty cute?

BedeBaby: and I kind of want to kiss her now?

BedeBaby: Like fuck 

BedeBaby: please save me I don't like having feelings

Goth: JHGFJHFGJHFGHJHJH

Goth: AMAZING

Goth: DO YOU KNOW HOW LONG I’VE WAITED FOR THIS CONFESSION???

Goth: A LONG TIME

BedeBaby: you make it sound like I’ve been crushing on her forever

Goth: BECAUSE YOU HAVE

Goth: YOU LITERALLY HAVE

BedeBaby: ???

Goth: I’VE HAD TO ENDURE YOUR MOON EYES FOR MONTHS BEDE.

Goth: MONTHS

BedeBaby: I’m leaving this chat

Goth: I NEED TO TELL GLORIA ABOUT THIS RIGHT AWAY

BedeBaby: No

BedeBaby: NO  
  
BedeBaby: MARNIE  
  
BedeBaby: MARNIE I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU SAY ANYTHING TO HER I WILL MURDER YOU MYSELF

~~~

Chairman_Rose: Why is Bede screaming in his room right now?  
  
Olive: Hormones  
  
Chairman_Rose: What?

Olive: Hormones

~~~

Rose: Are you alright?

Beet: No my life is falling apart at the seams.

Rose: Why?

Beet: Marnie might tell Gloria I have a crush on her.

Rose: Oh. I thought it was something worse by the way you were screaming.

Rose: Have fun

Bede: I hate you

~~~

Beet: So I recently found out that I uhhh like Gloria

Beet: GLORIA

Beet: I hate everything

Beet: but it's true??? And she's so cute so?? 

Beet: But Marnie is totally going to tell on me and I can't stop her,,,

Beet: this is not the way I wanted to die

Beet: with my crush knowing all about my infatuation for her

Beet: and potentially making fun of me for it for the rest of my life

Olive: wow suck it up you big baby

Beet: This is serious, Oleana!

Olive: and so is my beauty sleep

Olive: so stop texting me at 12 in the morning

Bede: :/

Olive: bitch what did I just say

Beet: :////

~~~

YELL: Hey guess what?

#00One: What?  
  
YELL: Bede definitely has a crush on you

_YELL has now been banned from this group chat._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> dfhjfhjd the usernames for these group chats is so fun to come up with
> 
> everyone is some shades of OOC here but it's a chatfic so I think that's expected gfhgfhj.
> 
> Things I love: people who think their pining is unrequited when it's so obviously requited. I live for this dynamic and I have not a clue why. I like to think Bede and Gloria eventually reach this in level of relationship later on and lowkey have feelings for each other but can't be bothered to accept/admit that so easily fjhgfj


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Currently at school career fair avoiding all social interactions :))))
> 
> Don’t ever mistake me for a social person bc going alone to events like these make me want to legitimately cry :)))))
> 
> ANYWAYS! 
> 
> My own fear of social irl interaction aside, this is the second chapter for this and a lot of ideas are borrowed <strike>stolen</strike> from EtherealNyx’s interpretations of Sonia and gym leader Opal. These takes on them aren’t my own but I love the take so I’m using them here Owo

SanderSonia: Hey ;)  
  
ActualChampionTYVM: Hewwo :DDD

SanderSonia: Want to grab a smoothie? My treat ;)

ActualChampionTYVM: D: I’m busy atm though.

SanderSonia: How about tomorrow then? ;)

ActualChampionTYVM: Can’t. Got a regional meeting to go to. To talk about…rocks or something. You know how much Steven Stone loves his rocks. I won’t be able to leave for _hours._

Sandersonia: Fair. How about this weekend? :)

ActualChampionTYVM: Got a gym leader meet-up then. Oh, and an appointment with Rose. He’s probs gonna scold me again :’’D  
  
SanderSonia: …

SanderSonia: I change my mind. I’ll just ask Hop if he wants a smoothie instead.

ActualChampionTYVM: ???

Actual ChampionTYVM: Alright…?

~~~

SanderSonia: Can I murder your brother? Is that legal?

Hoppity: NO

Hoppity: I KNOW HE’S ANNOYING BUT HE’S STILL MY BIG BROTHER DON’T HURT HIM

Hoppity: Seriously though what happened?

SanderSonia: Why are you suddenly speaking in proper sentences?

Hoppity: Marnie made me :P

SanderSonia: Ah

SanderSonia: Anyways, your brother’s dumb. I ask him out for a smoothie-

Hoppity: A smoothie???

SanderSonia: Yeah, a smoothie. BTW you’re welcome to come and get a smoothie with me today if you like. My treat.

Hoppity: YEAH!!! FREE SMOOTHIES!!!

SanderSonia: Regardless tho I ask him out and he just,,, says he’s busy,,, like,,, does he not know I’m asking him on a date?

Hoppity: My big brother’s dumb, Nia. I thought we established this already.

SanderSonia: But I’m literally flirting with him, winky face emoji and all???

Hoppity: I don't know who to tell you, Nia. He's as dumb as a sack of bricks and no amount of winking emojis is ever going to change that.

~~~

TheChampion: I think I somehow pissed Sonia off. She won’t answer my texts anymore D:

FairyLeader: Gee I wonder why

TheChampion: What does that mean?

FairyLeader: oh…nothing you need to know about :3c

WaterLeader: What did she say to you before she cut you off?

TheChampion: She asked if I wanted to grab a smoothie with her.

FireLeader: hawt

TheChampion: ???

GrassLeader: And what did you say?

TheChampion: That I was busy. She even asked multiple times and used a lot of winking emojis but I told her I was booked for all those times so??

TheChampion: I haven’t done anything wrong, have I??

DarkLeader: Why is our Champion so fucking dumb.

RockLeader: Bro why do you have to do Sonia dirty like this

PsychicLeader: Ugh and she’s making it _so_ obvious for you

TheChampion: ??? Stop being cryptic guys and say something

ElectricLeader: Dude

ElectricLeader: Dude

ElectricLeader: Sonia is totally into y-  
  
ElectricLeader: hey Opal, fuck off from the inside of my head!

FairyLeader: No. I'm not letting you ruin this for the rest of us.

TheChampion: What is Sonia into??? Hello??? Guys???

IceLeader: Oh my god I’m going to strangle him

FairyLeader: Better you than Sonia

GhostLeader: Poor Sonia

GroundLeader: Poor Sonia indeed l m a o

FightingLeader: You know, while we're on the topic of her...Can we all just agree that Sonia’s actually pretty hot amirite? Maybe I should just ask her on a date or something one of these days.

FightingLeader: ;)

TheChampion: No. I forbid it.

FightingLeader: Tell me one good reason why I can’t :)

TheChampion: Because I said so

PoisonLeader: You know, I could ask her out too. She’s pretty cute.

TheChampion: Denied

FlyingLeader: What about me?

SteelLeader: Or me?

TheChampion: No

TheChampion: No one here is allowed to date Sonia

FairyLeader: I’m cackling

WaterLeader: *holds head in hands*

FireLeader: He’s so dumb yet so in denial

BugLeader: I'm suddenly thinking we should elect a new Champion

DragonLeader: Oh??? Big Mood

TheChampion: Bitch??? You can’t kick me off my throne so don’t even dare.

SteelLeader: We can’t

FairyLeader: But Gloria can :))))

SteelLeader: Dammit Opal

~~~

Annoying: I see you asked your big fat crush out on a date

SanderSonia: Oh god he didn’t

Annoying: He did :)

Annoying: Have fun knowing that all the gym leaders now know you asked him out :)

SanderSonia: I fucking hate my life

~~~

ActualChampionTYVM: Sonia?

ActualChampionTYVM: Sonia???

ActualChampionTYVM: What did I do wrong Sonia???

~~~

Hoppity: Leon won’t stop messaging me. He wants to know what’s going down w/ you.

SanderSonia: Tell him to fuck off.

Hoppity: Fair enough.

~~~

HopVine: She says she’s busy.

DandeLeon: D:

HopVine: If you want to go find her she’s at the north train station. Probably getting smoothies. She texted me earlier and said she was upset. You should go check it out.

DandeLeon: Yeah, I think I will then D:

~~~

SanderSonia: You brat

Hoppity: Whatever are you talking about?

SanderSonia: I can _see_ Leon standing inside the smoothie place. And I know the only one I told my location to is _you_

Hoppity: Look, we both have the same goal here. You want to snog my brother and I want him to stop being a lovesick idiot forever in denial. This is a win-win for us as far as I’m concerned.

SanderSonia: <strike>ugh I still can’t get used to you typing properly</strike>.

Hoppity: <strike>Me neither. But a promise is a promise, laughing out loud.</strike>

SanderSonia: Regardless I see your point. I don’t like it but I see it.

Hoppity: Good :D

Hoppity: Now go ahead and make up with my brother so you can make out with him :D

SanderSonia: I hate you

Hoppity: I love you too

~~~

_FairyLeader has attached an image to the chat._

WaterLeader: Damn, wait. Sonia actually managed to kiss him?

FairyLeader: *wipes away a tear* They grow up so fast.

FireLeader: God I totally envy her because _I _want to kiss Leon.

SteelLeader: Ooo and I want to kiss Sonia.

WaterLeader: Sonia’s p hot ngl. Would snog 10/10

PsychicLeader: Are we ignoring the fact that Charizard’s literally eating a plastic cup?

BugLeader: Yes, yes we are.

TheChampion: Take down that photo or I’m firing all of you.

SteelLeader: Can’t fire us if you aren’t the Chairman :P

TheChampion: I’ll demote you to the Minor League then

PoisonLeader: *gasps* Not the Minor League

BugLeader: Anything but the Minor League!!!

GhostLeader: Opal maybe you should…

GhostLeader: just take it down….

FairyLeader: Nah I’m getting my money’s worth out of this. And a punch from Sonia, probably, but my money’s worth nonetheless.

TheChampion: I change my mind. I’m keeping Allister. The rest of you can go.

GhostLeader: :D

FightingLeader: Suck up

GhostLeader: D:

~~~

Protege: Help I think I'm in love with Sonia

Protege: Oh sorry wrong person

Chairman_Rose: Leon

Chairman_Rose: Leon WAIT

~~~

DandeLeon: Help I think I'm in love with Sonia

HopVine: Oh my god.

HopVine: FINALLY

DandeLeon: ???

HopVine: brb I gotta tell my friends the good news

DandeLeon: ?????????????

~~~

Annoying: You look so cute when you're flustered.

SanderSonia: Oh my god tell me you did not.

_Annoying has attached an image to the chat._

Annoying: Of course I did. 

SanderSonia: Okay but _how_

Annoying: Same way I do everything:

Annoying: With magic

SanderSonia: Bullshit  
  
Annoying: Be grateful that the image came out clearly.

Annoying: Here, I'll even print it out and put it in a picture frame for you

SanderSonia: I'm deleting you from my contacts list

Annoying: You can try

Annoying: But I'll just hack myself back in later fucker

~~~

SanderSonia: @ Gloria. Please kick Opal's ass for me. I'm cheering you on.

Glorious: Will do :P

~~~

Annoying: Rude

Annoying: You know I'll just win, right?

Annoying: Sonia?

Annoying: Sonia I know you're reading these

Annoying: SONIA

_Annoying has been banned from this group chat._


End file.
